Monthly Archives: June 2013

Why I Can’t Rate My First Year of Marriage

NOTE: I was on vacation last week, so I missed getting to link up to my latest HeartSupport post. Find it below.

This June, my husband and I will celebrate one year of marriage, and we’re happily looking forward to the next 50. I don’t know if we did that first year right or what’s coming for us in the next few years. By no means are we experts, but we did sit down to discuss what went right and what didn’t go as right in our first year. (I’m married to an engineer so it’s pretty normal to have those types of analytical conversations.)

Besides our tendency to have nearly scientific discussions, we realized that our relationship couldn’t be marked by how healthy we calculated or thought it was. It had to be measured by how much our marriage showed God’s goodness. Unfortunately, there’s no yardstick for that. Instead, each day we’ve made a commitment to trusting God to show up in our marriage even on the days when my husband burned a frozen pizza or when I bleached his boxers.

We didn’t always get it right. In harder days, a simple argument boiled into angry words. At the end of it all though, our prayer has been that our marriage stand on faith in God. After all, God created the human relationship as a testament to his goodness. He wants us to experience things like honesty and love and friendship. Here are a couple of other components my husband and I have prioritized for us (in no particular order):

Find out those components here.


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The Imperfect Wife

I’m over at Boundless this week. Check it out below.

I was scared to walk down the aisle, but it wasn’t because I was worried about stumbling over my dress. I was worried about being a wife.

I was scared to walk down the aisle, but it wasn’t because I was worried about stumbling over my dress or fainting forward into the minister. Well, I was a little worried about those things, but mostly, I was worried about being a wife.

Keep reading here.

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When Your In-Laws Visit

My husband’s family isn’t like mine, and because of that I worried that they wouldn’t like me. When Derek and I were dating, we visited his family in Odessa, Texas a few times, and I’d seen them on occasion when they made trips to see Derek in college. For a few hours, I would smile bright and say what I was sure were charming and witty things.

But then after Derek and I married, they started coming to our house and I worried about the floors and our living room and our kitchen and what they would think of the home we were building together. After all, our home was a reflection of our lives as a married couple. Would they notice that Derek was wearing a wrinkled T-shirt? Would they think I didn’t know how to iron? Would they look in my office and picture their daughter-in-law’s work as caffeine-induced scribbling? Would they hate my decorating for being too modern? Too boring?

Read the rest over at

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